16
Zhao Jian Gue didn’t know how to explain.
He didn’t think that this moment would come so fast.
Xiao Lin was still trying hard to explain to Ji Han: “Sect Leader, subordinate was just talking to Hero Zhao because….”
Ji Han coldly said: “I’m not asking you.”
Xiao Lin was forced to shut his mouth and step aside.
Ji Han turned his gaze back to Zhao Jian Gue: “I’m asking you.”
Zhao Jian Gue knew that any explanation right now was of no use. He could only vehemently think of that last move.
The text said there had to be a wall.
Ji Han currently stood next to the open doorway, behind him were two delicate looking maids; he first had to trick Ji Han into standing before a wall.
Zhao Jian Gue said: “Come here, I’ll tell you what we were doing.”
Ji Han still had a dark look on his face staring at him, staying completely motionless.
Zhao Jian Gue thought for a moment, then said: “Some things, I think you won’t want others to hear.”
Ji Han asked: “This Venerable One’s actions are candid and straightforward, there is nothing that can’t be known to others.”
Zhao Jian Gue said: “‘Be together in life or in death.’”
Ji Han immediately came over.
Behind Zhao Jian Gue’s back was the wall.
Ji Han gritted his teeth and asked: “What exactly do you want to say?!”
Very good. The first step had been actualized.
Second step was to take the other by surprise.
Zhao Jian Gue waved for Ji Han to come closer. “Lend me your ear.”
Ji Han: “… …”
Zhao Jian Gue: “Be together in life…”
Ji Han was expressionless as he leaned his ear close: “SAY WHAT YOU WANT FAST.”
His words hadn’t finished orating yet and Zhao Jian Gue had suddenly grabbed his wrist, flipped and pushing him against the wall.
Ji Han’s back brusquely hit the hard surface; feeling sore, his heart’s anger rushed forward –he wished he could enact on this person “1000 blades, 10000 cuts”*. Just as he was going to make a move however, Zhao Jian Gue squeezed his chin and moved in close to just before his eyes.
Ji Han froze.
In his memories, there had never been anyone that dared to be this close to him before.
Not to mention, this…this was a man!
Not just Ji Han, but everyone in the room was also muddled.
Including Zhao Jian Gue.
According to the book, the next step was to…kiss.
But how should I kiss?! Kiss the face, lips or the forehead?! A straight kiss or a slanted kiss?! How long do I kiss?! An instant or a moment?! When kissing do I continue kissing without stop or stop moving during the kiss?! Is the continued kissing like a woodpecker?! But stopping without moving is so awkward!
How come none of these criteria were specified by the heroes!! What good are you guys for anyway!!!
Zhao Jian Gue’s inner heart was surging, but outwardly he could only maintain his composure, coldly looking at Ji Han.
Ji Han’s face was extremely close.
Zhao Jian Gue suddenly realized that Ji Han’s appearance was naturally quite attractive; it was only that he tended to have too gloomy of an expression. If he were to just smile some more, he imagined the man would look even better.
And just like that Zhao Jian Gue thought of what Yue Qing Qing had said to him before.
The corners of his mouth curved up hard, slightly smiling towards Ji Han.
Ji Han: “… …”
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …”
Ji Han: “… …”
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …”
Zhao Jian Gue disappointingly let go and turned away. “… …I have to recuperate for a bit, I’ll be back in awhile.”
Ji Han: “… …”
Ji Han: “DO YOU HAVE AN ILLNESS OR SOMETHING?!”
*[1000 blades, 10000 cuts] Idiom for the type of punishment as can be expected haha.
17
By the time he screamed however, Zhao Jian Gue had already made it out the door.
Ji Han stayed frozen for a long time, before suddenly realizing that there were several other people still present in this room.
He turned his head to look darkly at Xiao Lin and then those two maids.
The slightly older maid suddenly clutched her chest and quickly fainted to the ground, declaring: “Ah, this humble servant this morning forgot to eat breakfast and suddenly feels fatigued, eyes foggy…completely unable to see anything…”
Ji Han: “… …”
The younger aged maid was panicking more so.
She looked to her left and then to her right. At a loss, she in the end just shut her eyes, and with a ‘putong!’ sound collapsed next to her servant jiejie’s** side.
Xiao Lin was deeply nervous: “Sect Leader, this really isn’t what you think it is.”
Ji Han laughed coldly. “Whatever it was doesn’t matter anymore.”
Since everyone saw it, then all he had to do was kill and seal everyone’s lips.
Xiao Lin exclaimed in panic: “Hero Zhao was just… …he was just… …just asking me what your dietary preferences are!”
Ji Han was stunned: “My dietary preferences?”
Xiao Lin nodded again and again: “Hero Zhao wants to personally cook for Sect Leader!”
Ji Han: “… …”
**Jie Jie means older sister, but it can be used for older females in a work/professional setting, not necessarily blood related, as is the case here.
18
Zhao Jian Gue walked two complete circles around the yard’s circumference before finally calming down.
He didn’t understand.
Not even back when he individually faced the Western Heaven Cultivatist Luo Cha’s Demonic powers was he this flustered. Just what was making him be at such a loss? Wasn’t it just the matter of closing one’s eyes and pressing the lips down?
Eventually, he had no choice but to return to the room.
The two maids had already retreated by then, Ji Han pulled a long face as he sat at the table. Xiao Lin stood tremblingly at his side.
Zhao Jian Gue said: “I finished recuperating.”
Ji Han looked at him, as if having seen some sort of monster.
Zhao Jian Gue continued speaking: “You…go over and stand next to the wall?”
Ji Han coldly opened his mouth to say: “This evening I want to eat scrambled egg noodles. The noodles need to have two sesame oil stir fried eggs, add julienned ginger, they are not allowed to have any green onions. Top the noodles with sesame oil after leaving the pot. If the noodles have one bit of green onions, then you must immediately vacate the sect for this Venerable One.”
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …ah?”
19
Ji Han had already stepped out of the door with an indifferent expression.
Zhao Jian Gue was quite confused so he turned to ask Xiao Lin: “What was that about?”
Xiao Lin obsequiously said: “An extemporized solution… … Hero Zhao, this is an extemporized solution!”
Zhao was even more at a loss.
Xiao Lin spoke: “I told Sect Leader that you just now were inquiring about his dietary preferences.”
Zhao Jian Gue: “Dietary preferences? Why?”
Xiao Lin: “Because you want to personally cook for him!”
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …”
Xiao Lin spoke: “My mother once told me, in order to grab a hold of a man’s heart that one must first grab a hold of his stomach.”
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …”
Xiao Lin spoke again: “Hero Zhao can obtain even the title ‘World’s Number One Swordsman’, just one measly bowl of scrambled egg noodles is definitely not a difficult thing.”
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …”
Xiao Lin: “Hero Zhao! The Hao Ran League are all dependent on you!”
… …
Zhao Jian Gue said: “There is one thing I don’t understand.”
Xiao Lin quickly answered: “Hero Zhao please say it!
Zhao Jian Gue slowly opened his mouth to ask: “Why would your mother teach you how to grab a hold of a MAN’S heart?”
Xian Lin: “… …”
20
Zhao Jian Gue had never used his pair of hands to grip a kitchen knife before.
For martial masters, anything in the world could become a weapon used to kill someone, a kitchen knife is still a knife, and naturally still a weapon. Zhao Jian Gue may be the number one swordsman, but the weapons he was skilled in using were not few in number. He had carefully studied knives before but naturally none of those knives were of the kitchen kind.
He had just wanted to mince some garlic but had already lost grip of the knife twice.
If it hadn’t been for his apt agility then his feet would have long since been pierced.
Xiao Lin couldn’t watch anymore and so he called for the kitchen’s cooking lady to come and write a recipe for advisement.
From Ji Han’s childhood this lady had already been on kitchen duty for meals. She couldn’t be any more cognizant of the sect leader’s taste preferences. These scrambled egg noodles were easy to make and easy to get started with; she just gave a few simple instructions. The noodles were ready-made ones. Zhao Jian Gue just had to dunk them in water, and then after the eggs were cooked, mix them in with the cooked noodles.
She also instructed specifically that the sect leader deeply hated green onions. Though, when he was frying the eggs, he still had to add some raw ginger and minced garlic.
Xiao Lin gave Zhao Jin Gue the recipe and then went to run errands for Ji Han.
Presently, Zhao Jian Gue looked at the recipe, deep in thought.
Even the most difficult to learn sword manual to him was not as confusing and incomprehensible as this.
Boiling the noodles seemed easy: the cooking lady had indicated a set amount of time, but still he burned through a couple of noodle batches, until finally the stuff he fished out looked like noodles.
Scrambled eggs were seemingly simple too: Zhao Jian Gue followed the cooking lady’s instructions and first heated some oil, then put the eggs into the pot.
By then the sky’s color was already evening.
The sect leader personally visited the kitchen, inspecting the progress of his scrambled egg noodles.
He glanced at Zhao Jian Gue: holding a spatula, with clothes and face all covered in gray and black soot. Then he looked down at the wok to see two roundish eggs.
Ji Han became lost in thought.
21
Ji Han pointed at the wok and sternly asked: “What is this?”
Zhao Jian Gue answered: “Scrambled eggs.”
Ji Han: “… …”
Zhao Jian Gue continued saying: “I heard from Xiao Lin that you really like eggs so I put in an extra one for you.”
Ji Han: “… …”
Zhao Jian Gue: “Just wait a bit, they’ll be ready soon.”
Ji Han spoke: “Do you know before scrambling eggs you have to first crack and discard the egg shells?”
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …ah?”
Ji Han picked up a pair of chopsticks from the side and poked slightly at the eggs in the wok. Zhao Jian Gue even added some garlic and ginger beneath them. Two roundish eggs mixed in with some crookedly sliced accompaniments was quite visually….horrifying.
Who taught him to cook like this?!
Ji Han asked: “You’ve never eaten scrambled eggs before?”
Zhao Jian Gue answered: “Naturally I have.”
Ji Han: “Do scrambled eggs have shells on them?”
“No,” Zhao Jian Gue replied, “Don’t worry, in a moment I’ll peel the egg shells off.”
Ji Han: “… …”
… …
Ji Han felt that this martial arts number one swordsman had a lot of illnesses.
He wanted to say a few more words but unexpectedly the eggs inside the wok started emitting a ‘zzzzz’ sound.
He gazed down to look at those two roundish eggs.
Zhao Jian Gue couldn’t resist glancing down as well, and even picked up a pair of chopsticks to gently poke at them too.
“They should be done soon.”
Hero Zhao said that statement with a deep thoughtful look in his eyes.
Ji Han: “You really have an ill-“
He hadn’t been able to finish because suddenly both individuals heard the bang of an explosion.
Though this sound was not as severe or loud as Jiangnan’s Thunderbolt Court’s thunderbolt bombs, it was still enough to startle these two martial arts masters.
They reacted inherently fast: as soon as the sound occurred both had jumped back some feet to avoid impact.
After they thought it was safe to remove the sleeve used to cover their faces, the two finally saw the other’s miserable state.
On the wall, the ground, beside the stove, even on both their clothes and hair were all scraps of whitish-yellowish egg.
There was only one left inside of the wok.
Zhao Jian Gue flashed a confused look: “What the…”
He too didn’t get to finish his statement before the second egg also exploded.
… …
Zhao Jian Gue intoned: “This was an accident.”
Ji Han laughed coldly.
His hair and eyebrows were all covered with egg yolk, looking truly absurd.
Zhao Jian Gue prevaricated: “I can still try once more.”
Ji Han was angry enough to take the wok and slam it onto the man’s head.
Zhao Jian Gue: “Really, I can try aga-“
Ji Han angrily roared: “CLEAN THIS PLACE UP! THEN GET LOST FROM THIS VENERABLE ONE’S SECT!”
22
Zhao Jian Gue was a bit depressed.
Ji Han had told him to leave which is to say… … the seduction plan had to be declared a failure.
What should the Hao Ran League do now? And what should he do now?
Xiao Lin secretly came to comfort him.
“Hero Zhao, you shouldn’t worry,” Xiao Lin said. “Sect leader was just saying angry words he didn’t mean in the moment.”
Zhao Jian Gue grievingly said: “He already told me to get lost, can that still count as ‘angry words’?
Xiao Lin wanted to grab onto Zhao Jian Gue’s hands to reinvigorate the man’s determination to continue seducing the sect leader.
Zhao Jian Gue just exhaled a long sigh.
Xiao Lin: “Hero Zhao, if the sect leader really wanted you to leave then he wouldn’t have told you to clean up the kitchen.”
Zhao Jian Gue didn’t understand.
Xian Lin: “He would have immediately thrown you out.”
Zhao Jian Gue: “That…”
Xiao Lin: “See Hero Zhao! Sect leader still loves you!”
Zhao Jian Gue: “Uh… ….”
Xiao Lin quite excitably exclaimed: “Hero Zhao, you must successfully cook scrambled egg noodles to win Sect Leader’s affections!”
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …”
23
By now it was late into the night.
Zhao Jian Gue deeply contemplated the many heroes that offered up their entire lives for sake of the Hao Ran League; he also contemplated his good friends from the Righteous Sects, and finally made up his mind.
He was going to go back to the kitchen and try once more to make a bowl of scrambled egg noodles!
… …
The kitchen’s lights were already open.
Zhao Jian Gue contemplated this. He kept his breaths steady as he carefully walked forward, wanting to see who exactly was in the kitchen.
If it was the cooking lady then it would be perfect because he could then ask her to teach him how to cook a regular-bowl-of-non-exploding-scrambled-egg-noodles.
If it was somebody else he would turn his head and walk away, pretending like he had never stepped in here this night.
But the person in the kitchen was in fact Ji Han.
Carrying a bowl of scrambled egg noodles, the man locked gazes with him right as he stepped in.
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …”
Ji Han: “… …”
24
Actually when Zhao Jian Gue stepped to the doorway, Ji Han had already become cognizant of the newcomer’s presence.
It was just, this was HIS Sacred Sect after all -he didn’t have to hide from anyone.
He didn’t expect that the person to enter would actually be Zhao Jian Gue.
Both people felt a bit awkward.
Ji Han had a frigid expression; in his hand were a pair of chopsticks that held a strand of noodle.
Zhao Jian Gue suddenly realized that this scenario had also been written in the script book, and it too had also been underlined red. It said that if this scenario was done well, the seduction could be successful in one swoop.
He couldn’t help but be a bit excited at this prospect.
Ji Han spared a glance at him, a sullen expression on his face, still unwilling to converse.
Zhao Jian Gue opened his mouth to speak: “I can’t sleep.”
Ji Han: “… …”
Zhao Jian Gue: “You can’t sleep as well?”
Ji Han: “… …”
Zhao Jian Gue: “Can you chat with me?”
Ji Han: “Cannot.”
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …”
How come he’s not behaving as he should according to the script?!
25
The Hao Ran League elders told him that if he were to encounter in the night an unable to sleep Demon Sect Leader, then he was to converse with the man about poems and songs to the point of [romance blossoming in the air]*. He was to further grasp onto the man’s by letting the boy reveal his fragile vulnerable side to him. After finding out about the other’s weaknesses then the seduction plan was near successful completion.
Zhao Jian Gue was not the eloquent poetic type of person. He didn’t know of any poems or lyrics, and couldn’t converse with someone to the point of “blossoming romance”. Everything he knew was about the 3 feet “Qing Feng”** in his hand, and the only things he could converse about involved this 3 feet “Qing Feng”.
Regardless of topic, it was always a good prospect to talk to the other person – as the idiom goes: “different routes to the same destination”. In the end he’ll get to where he needs to be.
Zhao Jian Gue mentally concluded.
He walked a bit closer and opened his mouth to say to Ji Han: “You… … what age did you start practicing swordsmanship?”
Ji Han looked at him icily, not answering.
Zhao Jian Gue had no choice but to go on and continue speaking: “From the first time I was able to walk I picked up a sword. Since then till now has been about 26-27 years.”
Ji Han didn’t reply.
Zhao Jian continued: “You’re younger than me yet your blade accomplishments are not lesser to mine. Your sword skills are fast and fierce: abandoning defense for offense, you’re considered one of the top swordsman in the martial arts world.”
Ji Han finally coldly opened his mouth: “Just what exactly are you trying to say?”
Zhao Jian Gue answered: “Your weaknesses.”
Ji Han: “My weaknesses?”
Zhao Jian Gue nodded.
In actuality, he didn’t understand the elders’ words.
If knowing the weakness of the man meant success, then the first time he saw Ji Han’s swordplay Zhao Jian Gue had already identified the guy’s weakness, but still even now Ji Han treated him indifferently.
Ji Han’s interest was overtly piqued, he slowly sat up straight, indicating for Zhao Jian Gue to continue speaking.
Zhao Jian Gue explained: “Your sword plays are all one gamble; if one was to not hit, then there would be no path for retreat.”
Ji Han stated: “I’ve never once missed.”
Zhao Jian Gue remarked: “But I have at least 80% confidence of avoiding your first strike.”
Ji Han wrinkled his brows, carefully contemplating Zhao Jian Gue’s words.
Zhao Jian Gue spoke again: “If you were willing to give yourself a path for retreat, let your swordplay become more stable, the title of ‘Number One Swordsman’ isn’t a far fetched goal.”
Ji Han hesitated before saying: “You’re saying I can defeat you?”
Zhao Jian Gue: “Over time, your skills will definitely surpass mine.”
This statement he spoke with utmost certainty.
When he was Ji Han’s age, his sword skills were not as good as the boy. Moreover he could tell that Ji Han could really endure hardships, and Zhao Jian Gue was the self-effacing type of person so seeing such a promising young talented man made him very happy.
Ji Han looked at him, a light as if having turned on inside his eyes.
Having found Ji Han’s weakness, Zhao Jian Gue didn’t know what else to converse about.
He could only shut his mouth, standing to the side.
Ji Han suddenly asked him: “You can’t sleep?”
His expression had returned to his usual cold outlook with even his tone having regained that frigid timbre.
Zhao Jian Gue started cursing the concept of looking for weaknesses or vulnerabilities: completely pointless! Faintly, he answered: “Yes.”
Ji Han said: “You want to chat with me?”
Zhao Jian Gue answered: “Yes.”
Ji Han: “You should sit down.”
Zhao Jian Gue was a bit confused: “What?”
Ji Han coldly snorted, before saying: “I don’t like talking with someone while they’re standing.”
Zhao Jian Gue: “… …”
He… … successfully advanced another step?
APOLOGIES ELDERS! I ERRONEOUSLY BLAMED YOU GUYS.
*风花雪月, idiom meaning literally wind, flow, snow, moon, which you can altogether picture as fairly romantic settings on their own or together which is how I remember the phrase means “romance is in the air”
**Qing Feng = Green Edge, referring to his sword
Definitely-Not-Embarrassed's Chinese Translations 
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